“I was upset about the rising cost of food, too. But then I got smart.”

“Smart?”

“Look, when food costs began soaring, I complained as much as the next guy. I complained about fuel costs driving up shipping expenses, which drove up the cost of produce and meat. I complained about the emerging middle class in India and China.”

“What’s wrong with an emerging middle class?”

“Nothing, except that middle class folks have the means to eat well. They’re driving up the demand for decent grub, which is also driving up costs. I spent a lot of time complaining about Congress.”

“What does Congress have to do with rising food costs?”

“Our esteemed politicians are pumping big subsidies into ethanol production. Ethanol is made from things such as corn. Today, nearly a quarter of our corn production is being used to make fuel. That has increased the demand for corn, which has driven up its cost. It’s driven up the cost of beef, too — cows eat corn.”

“That’s no good.”

“But the thing that really got my goat is the speculators. According to The Washington Post, they’ve pulled their money out of the housing market and pumped it into grain futures. On top of all the other food woes we’ve been having, there is a drought in Australia, which means there is a wheat shortage, too.”

“Let me get this straight: The same investors who helped create a housing bubble are now driving up the cost of grain futures?”

“That’s right. And if Americans think they have it bad, imagine how hard it is for the world’s poor to afford dinner nowadays. Riots are breaking out all over the world as frustrated folks struggle to feed themselves.”

“That is terrible. Could you explain what you mean when you say you got smart?”

“Oh, that’s easy. You see, I’m just an average Joe trying to feed my family. I concluded there is no way I can beat the conditions that are driving up food costs, so I may as well join them.”

“Join them?”

“I read an article by Brett Arends in The Wall Street Journal. He encouraged folks to load up their pantries with food — that with food inflation running at 4.5 percent a year, food was a better investment than keeping your money in money-market funds. That gave me a great idea.”